Mazzy [entries|friends|calendar] Mari [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[06 May 2009|12:34pm] X-men Origins was very disappointing. Very. 10 comments|post comment

[26 Nov 2008|03:26pm] Who bought me Hannibal? 1 comment|post comment

[05 Nov 2008|06:25pm] Woo! Obama! *boogies* 5 comments|post comment

[11 Sep 2008|07:56pm] 1. There are 30 questions. 2. Answer each question with one name. 3. Next to each number, write only the name of the person who fits. 4. Don't tell the questions to anyone who isn't doing the meme Comment or PM your email to get the questions, but then you have to do it. ( cut ) 4 comments|post comment

[14 Aug 2008|02:41pm] [ mood | thirsty ] So funiiii These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were taking place. ______________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. _______________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. _______________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said "Where am I Cathy?" ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one. __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Uh... I was gettin' laid! __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it? __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Guess. __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies, have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that? __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 P.M. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him! __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Huh.... are you qualified to ask that question? __________________________________________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. 1 comment|post comment

[18 Apr 2008|10:30am] YAAAAAAAANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! 3 comments|post comment

[03 Mar 2008|07:48pm] Lmfao ( Ellen Page On The Late Night Show ) 2 comments|post comment

[03 Mar 2008|05:46pm] [ mood | exhausted ] I love Frick. 6 comments|post comment

[31 Jan 2008|10:49am] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | Bubbly- Colbie Caillat ] Now let me whine about Heather. You see, she sucks too. She makes fun of me, tickles me, makes me things, calls me pet names, takes pictures for me, teases me, sings for me, wakes me up to wish me a good morning, gets really excited when I do things right, gets happy for me when things are good for me, is absolutely gorgeous and a total bitch about it too. She drives me crazy. What a ho. I'm not procrastinating! Never! No way! Torture me with all I wanted. I love you guys. All of you. Hev, Murray, Kit, Smuzy, Helena, Jace, Ron, Kirdso, Father Pa, Patty, Alister, Dueper and I dunno who else reads my laments. But ALL of you. Like, ALL. ^_^ 22 comments|post comment

[23 Jan 2008|12:41pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | Juno Soundtrack- So Nice So Smart- Kimya Dawnson ] I'm in love with the Juno soundtrack. Monday Colin gave me a copy, but while we were in Target he let me listen to it on his iPod touch (which I totally want) and I was totally groovin'. This is the opening song to the movie. ( Video and lyrics ) But my favorite has to be "Anyone Else But You" with Ellen Page singing it, she's so damn cute. If my internet wasn't being so gay... ( Video and lyrics ) And this is just for shits and giggles, cos lmfao! ( Watch it bitchos ) I'm so obsessed with Juno now. But I really loved it a lot lot lot. I can't wait to own it. post comment

[14 Jan 2008|11:18pm] [ mood | uncomfortable ] Heather linked me to this and I just think it's absolutely fucking awesome. http://www.techdo.com/images/largest-know-star.htm post comment

The Theory of 'Three Human Species' [14 Dec 2007|06:25pm] [ mood | annoyed ] So, I was at the train station waiting for a train (obviously) and I got one of those free newspapers and this was on it, I found it quite interesting. ( Three Human Species ) 1 comment|post comment

[01 Sep 2007|01:42pm] You scored as Bellatrix Lestrange, You are Bellatrix Lestrange. You are persistent, loyal, and harsh. When you set your loyalties, you never break them. If you make promises and break them, you punish yourself greatly for it. You put your all into your beliefs and refuse to back down even when times get tough or others doubt you. You're extremely resourceful and determined, and after you've accomplished something, you expect recognition. As long as you're pleasing those you're loyal to, you don't care about others' opinions of you. </td> Draco Malfoy 81% Bellatrix Lestrange 81% Hermione Granger 81% Harry Potter 81% Percy Weasley 78% Severus Snape 72% Oliver Wood 63% Sirius Black 59% Luna Lovegood 59% Albus Dumbledore 59% Lord Voldemort 59% Remus Lupin 56% Neville Longbottom 56% Ron Weasley 31% Harry Potter Character Combatibility Test created with QuizFarm.com 15 comments|post comment

[01 May 2007|10:44pm] [ mood | crappy ] I have to move. I need to find a two bedroom apartment, that allows pets, for under $1100. Don't wanna move. 4 comments|post comment

woot [25 Jan 2007|06:43pm] ( another stolen survey from Suzy ) 1 comment|post comment

Fellow Cat Folk [23 Nov 2006|02:42pm] The other day I went Orion to get his vaccines updated and when I came back I was going through the folder I have with his files and I found this from a long time ago. The Truth About Declawing For many cat owners, their pet's natural impulse to scratch can become a problem. Declawimg may at first seem like the logical solution. However, declawing creates more problems than it solves. Physical and emotional complications arise from this procedure that are so severe, many people end up relinquishing their pets to animal shelters or worse, they put them to sleep. Declawing is a painful AMPUTATION of the entire first digit, NOT JUST THE NAIL. Once the digit has been removed, cats can no longer perform their natural stretching and kneading rituals. They become weaker as they age, and experience higher incidnce of arthritis in their backs and shoulders. Cats without claws have lost their first line of defense. They live in a constant state of stress. Less able to protect themselves, they cannot fight off other animals or escape quickly from dangerous situation. Most declawed cats will become biters because they can no longer use their claws as defense. Groomers, veterinarians and people who care for declawed cats in shelters will tell you (if you ask) that declawed cats are nervous, irritable and downright difficult to handle. Finally, declawed cats often stop using their litter boxes. Some cats apparently associate the pain they feel in their paws when trying to cover their waste with the little box itself. These cats seek a less painful place to urinate, such as a carpet or sofa. Even though there are ways to modify a cat's litter box behavior, in declawed cats it is a particularly difficult challange behavior the aversion results from pain. 13 comments|post comment

Everybody else is doing it, so why can't we? [10 Nov 2006|01:04pm] [ mood | guilty ] Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! Last Saturday I set belleironiclife's puppy on fire (-66 points). Last Friday I committed genocide... Sorry about that, mandala (-5000 points). In January I punched fempy in the arm (-10 points). Last Thursday I gave solo_shikamaru a life-saving blood transfusion (50 points). Last Wednesday I pulled over and changed super_kit's flat tire (15 points). Overall, I've been naughty (-5011 points). For Christmas I deserve a spanking! Sincerely, marimint Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username: 10 comments|post comment

[18 Jun 2006|02:16pm] ♥ Group F games Brasil-1 Croatia-0 Brasil-2 Australia-0 Brasil-4 Japan-1 ♥ 1 comment|post comment

[02 Apr 2006|10:40pm] I'm doing a friends cut again and turning my journal into friends only. This time I'm only keeping people I know bother reading my journal, and well, if I bother reading yours. I'm tired of certain cries for attention. I was gonna delete my whole journal but there are too many memories that I wanna keep and some of your journals are still good for me. So, if I've deleted you, it's either because I don't know who you are, or I just don't want to read your journal or I just don't read it in general. That's that. 12 comments|post comment

[28 Mar 2006|09:38am] Meow. Tell me the first thing that springs to your mind when you think of me. I don't care how insulting it is, just go on. 43 comments|post comment

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